I will never know
Myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel
01 FOREWORD
02.DONT STAY
Sometimes I
Need to remember just to breathe
Sometimes I
Need you to stay away from me
Sometimes I'm
In disbelief I didn't know
Somehow I
Need you to go
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
What you were changing me into
[Just give me myself back and]
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
Take all your faithlessness with you
[Just give me myself back and]
Don't stay
Sometimes I
Feel like I trusted you too well
Sometimes I
Just feel like screaming at myself
Sometimes I’m
In disbelief I didn't know
Somehow I
Need to be alone
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
What you were changing me into
[Just give me myself back and]
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
Take all your faithlessness with you
[Just give me myself back and]
Don't stay
I don't need you anymore
I don't want to be ignored
I don't need one more day
Of you wasting me away
I don't need you anymore
I don't want to be ignored
I don't need one more day
of you wasting me away
With no apologies
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
What you were changing me into
[Just give me myself back and]
Don't stay
Forget our memories
Forget our possibilities
Take all your faithlessness with you
[Just give me myself back and]
Don't stay
Don’t stay
Don’t stay
03 SOMEWHERE I BELONG
When this began I had nothing to say
And I'd get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find that
I'm not the only person with these things in mind
(Inside of me)
but all the vacancy the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I've got left to feeL
(Nothing to lose)
Just stuck, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own
And the fault is my own
I want to heal, I want to feel
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I've held so long
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)
I want to heal, I want to feel
Like I'm close to something real.
I want to find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
And I've got nothing to say
I cant believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
looking everywhere only to find that it's
Not the way I had imagined it all in my mind.
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
Cause I cant justify the way everyone is looking at me
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own
And the fault is my own
I want to heal, I want to feel
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I've held so long
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)
I want to heal, I want to feel
Like I'm close to something real
I want to find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
I will never know
Myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel
Anything else until my wounds are healed
I will never be
Anything 'til I break away from me
And I will break away
I'll find myself today
I want to heal, I want to feel
What I thought was never real
I want to let go of the pain I've held so long
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)
I want to heal, I want to feel
Like I'm close to something real
I want to find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
I want to heal, I want to feel like
I'm somewhere I belong
I want to heal, I want to feel like
I'm somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong
04LYING FROM YOU
When I pretend everything is what I want it to be
I look exactly like what you had always wanted to see
When I pretend I can forget about the criminal I am
Stealing second after second just 'cause I know I can
But I can't pretend this is the way it'll stay
I'm just trying to bend the truth
I can't pretend I'm who you want me to be
So I'm lying my way from you
No, no turning back now
I want to be pushed aside
So let me go
No, no turning back now
Let me take back my life
I'd rather be all alone
No turning back now
Anywhere on my own
'Cause I can see
No, no turning back now
The very worst part of you
Is me
I remember what they taught to me
Remember condescending talk of who I ought to be
Remember listening to all of that and this again
So I pretended up a person who was fitting in
And now you think this person really is me and
Trying to bend the truth
The more I push the more I'm pulling away
'Cause I'm
Lying my way from you
No, no turning back now
I want to be pushed aside
So let me go
No, no turning back now
Let me take back my life
I'd rather be all alone
No turning back now
Anywhere on my own
'Cause I can see
No, no turning back now
The very worst part of you
The very worst part of you
Is me
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
You
No turning back now
I want to be pushed aside
So let me go
No, no turning back now
Let me take back my life
I'd rather be all alone
No turning back now
Than anywhere on my own
'Cause I can't see
No, no turning back now
The very worst part of you
The very worst part of you
Is me
05 HIT THE FLOOR
There were just too many
Times people have tried to look inside of me
Wondering what I think of you
And I protect you out of courtesy
Too many times that I've held on
When I needed to push away
Afraid to say what was on my mind
Afraid to say what I need to say
Too many things that you say about me when I’m not around
You think having the upper hand
Means you gotta keep putting me down
But I've had too many stand-offs with you
It's about as much as I can stand
So I’ll wait until the upper hand is mine
One minute your on top
The next your not, watch it drop
Making your heart stop
Just before you hit the floor
One minute your on top
The next your not, missed your shot
Making your heart stop
You think you've won
And then it's all gone
So many people like me that put so much trust in all your lies
So concerned of what you think
To just say what we feel inside
So many people like me walk on eggshells all day long
All I know is that all I want is to feel like I'm not stepped on
There are so many things you say that make me feel
You've cross the line
What goes up will surely fall, and I'm counting down the time
Cause I've had so many stand-offs with you
Its about as much as I can stand
So I'm waiting until the upper hand is mine
One minute your on top
The next your not, watch it drop
Making your heart stop
Just before you hit the floor
One minute your on top
The next your not, missed your shot
Making your heart stop
You think you've won
And then it's all gone
And then it’s all gone
And then it’s all gone
And then it’s all gone
Now it’s all gone
I know I'll never trust a single thing you say
You knew your lies would divide us but you lied anyway
And all the lies have got you floating up above us all
But what goes up is got to fall
One minute your on top
The next your not, watch it drop
Making your heart stop
Just before you hit the floor
One minute your on top
The next your not, missed your shot
Making your heart stop
You think you've won
And then it's all gone
And then it’s all gone
And then it’s all gone
And then it’s all gone
Now it’s all gone
06 EASIER TO RUN
It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone
Something has been taken
From deep inside of me
A secret I’ve kept locked away
No one can ever see
Wounds so deep they never show
They never go away
Like moving pictures in my head
For years and years they've played
If I could change I would
Take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
If I could take all the shame to the grave I would
If I could change I would
Take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame to the grave
It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone
Sometimes I remember
The darkness of my past
Bringing back these memories
I wish I didn’t have
Sometimes I think of letting go
And never looking back
And never moving forward so
There would never be a past
If I could change I would
Take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
If I could take all the shame to the grave I would
If I could change I would
Take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame to the grave
Just washing it aside
All of the helplessness inside
Pretending I don't feel misplaced
Is so much simpler than change
It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
Than face all this pain here all alone
It's easier to run
If I could change I would
Take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made
It's so much easier to go
If I could change I would
Take back the pain I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made I would
If I could stand up and take the blame I would
I would take all my shame, to the grave
07 FAINT
I am
A little bit of loneliness
A little bit of disregard
A handful of complaints
But I can't help the fact
That everyone can see these scars
I am
What I want you to want
What I want you to feel
But it's like
No matter what I do
I can't convince you
To just believe this is real
So I let go watching you
Turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here
'Cause you're all that I got
I can't feel
The way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal
This damage anymore
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
I am
A little bit insecure
A little unconfident
'Cause you don't understand
But sometimes I don't make sense
I am
What you never want to say
But I've never had a doubt
It's like no matter what I do
I can't convince you
For once just to hear me out
Turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here
'Cause you're all that I got
I can't feel
The way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
No
Hear me out now
You're gonna listen to me
Like it or not
Right now
Hear me out now
You're going to listen to me
Like it or not
Right now
I can't feel
The way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
I can't feel
The way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal
This damage anymore
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
I can't feel
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
08 FIGURE
Nothing ever stops all these thoughts
And the pain attached to them
Sometimes I wonder why this is happening
It's like nothing I can do
Would distract me when
I think of how I shot myself in the back again
'Cause from the infinite words I could say
I put all the pain you gave to me on display
But didn't realize instead of setting it free
I took what I hated and made it apart of me
It never goes away (x2)
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I can't separate myself from
What I've done
I've given up a part of me
I've let myself become you
Hearing your name the memories come back again
I remember when it started happening
I'd see you in every thought I had and then
The thoughts slowly found words attached to them
And I knew as they escaped away I was
Committing myself to them and every day
I regret saying those things
'Cause now I see that
I Took what I hated and made it apart of me
[It never goes away] x2
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I can't separate myself from
What I've done
I've given up a part of me
I've let myself become you
[It never goes away] x4
GET AWAY FROM ME!
Give me my space back, you've gotta just (GO!)
Everything just comes down to memories of (YOU!)
I've kept it in but now I'm letting you (KNOW!)
I've let you go! So..
GET AWAY FROM ME!
Give me my space back, You've gotta just (GO!)
Everything just comes down to memories of (you)
I've kept it in without letting you (KNOW!)
I've let you go!
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I can't separate myself from
What I've done
I've given up a part of me
I've let myself become you
've let myself become you
I've let myself become lost inside
These thoughts of you
Giving up on part of me
I've let myself become you
09 BREAKING THE HABBIT
Memories consume like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume, I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again
I don't want to be the one the battles always choose
Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...
Clutching my cure, I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more, than any time before
I have no options left again
I don't want to be the one the battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight…
I'll paint it on the walls
'Cause I'm the one at fault
I'll never fight again
And this is how it ends
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...
10 FROM THE INSIDE
I don't know who to trust, no surprise
Everyone feels so far away from me
Heavy thoughts sift through dust and the lies
Trying not to break but I'm so tired of this deceit
Every time I try to make myself get back upon my feet
All I ever think about is this
All the tiring time between
And how trying to put my trust in you
Just takes so much out of me
Take everything from the inside
And throw it all away
'Cause I swear for the last time
I won't trust myself with you
Tension is building inside steadily
everyone feels so far away from me
Heavy thoughts forcing their way out of me
Trying not to break but I'm so tired of this deceit
Every time I try to make myself get back up on my feet
All I ever think about is this
All the tiring time between
And how trying to put my trust in you
Just takes so much out of me
Take everything from the inside
And throw it all away
'Cause I swear for the last time
I won't trust myself with you
I won't waste myself on you
You, you
Waste myself on you
You, you
I'll take everything from the inside
And throw it all away
'Cause I swear for the last time
I won't trust myself with you
Everything from the inside
And just throw it all away
'Cause I swear for the last time
I won't trust myself with you
You, you
11 NOBODY'S LISTENING
Coming at you
Coming at you
Coming at you
Yo, peep the style and the kids checking for it
The number one question is
How could you ignore it
We drop right back in the cut over basement tracks
With raps that got you backing this up like
[Rewind that]
We're just rolling with the rhythm
Rise from the ashes of stylistic division
With these non-stop lyrics of life living
Not to be forgotten but still unforgiven
But in the meantime there are those who wanna talk this and that
So I suppose that it gets to a point
Where feelings got to get hurt
And get dirty with the people spreading the dirt, it goes
Tried to give you warning
But everyone ignores me
[Told you everything loud and clear]
But nobody's listening
Call to you so clearly
But you don't want to hear me
Told you everything loud and clear]
But nobody's listening
I've got a heart full of pain head full of stress
Hand full of anger held in my chest
And everything left is a waste of time
I hate my rhymes
[But I hate everyone else's more]
I'm riding on the back of this pressure
Guessing that it's better I can't keep myself together
Because all of this stress gave me something to write on
And the pain gave me something I could set my sights on
You never forget the blood, sweat, and tears
The uphill struggle over years
The fear and trash talking and the people it was to
And the people that started it just like you
Tried to give you warning
But everyone ignores me
[Told you everything loud and clear]
But nobody's listening
Call to you so clearly
But you don't want to hear me
[Told you everything loud and clear]
But nobody's listening
I've got a heart full of pain head full of stress
Hand full of anger held in my chest
Uphill struggle blood, sweat, and tears
Nothing to gain everything to fear
Heart full of pain head full of stress
Hand full of anger held in my chest
Uphill struggle blood, sweat, and tears
Nothing to gain everything to fear
Heart full of pain
Tried to give you warning
But everyone ignores me
[Told you everything loud and clear]
But nobody's listening
Called to you so clearly
But you don't want to hear me
[Told you everything loud and clear]
But nobody's listening
I've got a heart full of pain head full of stress
[Nobody's listening]
Hand full of anger held in my chest
[Nobody's listening]
Uphill struggle blood, sweat, and tears
[Nobody's listening]
Nothing to gain everything to fear
[Nobody's listening]
Coming at you
Coming at you
Coming at you
Coming at you from every side
12 SESSION
13 NUMB
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
And I know I may end up failing too
But I know You were just like me
With someone disappointed in you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Tired of being what you want me to be
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Tired of being what you want me to be
L I N K I N P A R K
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